


Serenade

by Glasswing



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - Drama School, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Jamie sings and it's adorable, Jamie/Mako is the main ship, Multi, Musicals, Strong Language, partial songfic, songs included
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-07
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-20 03:31:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8234567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glasswing/pseuds/Glasswing
Summary: Jamison is the classic drama kid with a passion for musicals, practising every week on the empty high school stage. Mako is the quiet, reserved techie who watches him, entranced by the boy's performances. But Rutledge gets more than he bargained for when the songs become more and more personal...





	1. The Summers Die

**Author's Note:**

> https://youtu.be/as8HM2QLJqA
> 
> EDIT 08/OCT/16: Made some formatting changes and added a little bit of detail here and there. Nothing huge has changed, though <3

Playing _tour guide_ was not what Mako Rutledge had wanted to do today.

Especially not on the first damn _day_ of the year.

Pulling his scarf safely back over his mouth, he stepped into the autumn chill, thankful that the last of the students had dispersed to lessons. He wasn't _late,_ he argued to himself, everyone else was just _early_. And lost.

Mostly lost.

The majority of the students had seen his ID card and decided that _hey, he's the kid of one of the teachers, let's ask him loads of dumb questions._ Granted, he knew the answers to those questions - most of them, anyway - but it didn't stop them from being annoying. Did their timetables just vanish, into the thin September air, never to be seen again?

Shaking the thoughts from his head, he turned his attention back to the world around him. The leaves on the trees were still strong and green, framing the little road the Academy sat on, roots pushing up concrete. He'd have stopped to consider the symbolism if he didn't have somewhere to be.

"Hey!"

_Oh, here we go again..._

He turned his head in response, and had to look _down_ to identify the source of the shout - there was a boy, doubled over in front of him, panting as if he'd been sprinting. The kid's hands were stuffed into the jumper's front pocket, pressing down on his stomach like his life depended on it. His backpack, over-filled with god-knows-what, threatened to tip him over if he leant too far. _Newbie._ After one last dramatic gasp for air, the boy looked up, and amber eyes locked with Mako's own.

 _Oh, fuck_ me _, he's cute._

A shock of blonde hair was just visible beneath his hood, and those eyes were wide, sweet, apologetic. He was still wracked by gasping breaths, and he raised up a hand - his left - in a signal to wait. His gaze dropped, but then returned, as quickly as it went. 

"I, uh, sorry to bother ya! Couldn't direct me to tha main studio, could'ja? I dunno this place, an' I'm a lil' lost."

 _Oh, fuck_ me _, he's_ ** _cute_**.

The boy's accent was the thickest Australian he had heard in a long time, and it caught him off-guard. Mako opened his mouth to reply, only to remember his scarf - he pulled it down before he spoke. "Down that pathway there, there's a door on the right, and then go along that corridor. Can't miss it." Inwardly he cursed the way he talked, but it seemed to have no effect on the small- _er_ -

The boy stretched to his full height, and Mako only just stifled a curse.

_God, he's taller than I thought, he must be six foot at least._

Plus one to the _"cute"_ scale.

A beaming grin, a little bounce on the balls of his feet, and a chirping reply - "Thanks, mate! Ya saved my life!" - and he was gone.

Plus two.

_Oh, here we go again._

That adorable grin was burned into the back of his mind, entirely cheeky and genuine and sweet, like a new lightbulb lighting up a whole room. He tried to shake it out of his mind, but couldn't, the grin almost widening as if it knew _exactly_ what it was doing to him. 

He was _definitely_ late now.

**********

"Ah, Mako! Wondered where you had gone!"

He turned at the sound, a smile emerging beneath his scarf.

 _Aleksandra_.

A shock of pink hair was all that had changed since the last time he had seen her. She sported the same grin that she always had, green eyes bright with happiness, a small collection of friends on the bench around her.

A boy who looked a little older, a little taller - hair dyed silver, speaking excitedly, voice shining with a thick German accent.

Another boy, tiny in comparison, with a different accent that Mako couldn't place. His hair was blonde, a sprinkling of the same around his jaw. He was arguing intensely with his silver-haired friend.

A young lady, bundled up in a thick blue coat. An oversized mug of coffee in her hands. Hair up, in a Chinese style. Glasses a little too big for her, slipping down her nose.

An Indian girl who inclined her head in greeting, before her expression returned to one of scrutiny. Her brown eyes scanned the student block, passing judgement on all who crossed her path.

_The Set Design squad._

"Hey." 

Despite an effortlessly-raised eyebrow from the final girl, Aleksandra was satisfied with his response, reaching out to offer him a seat. "I would like to introduce you to Set Design group!" she beamed, making room for him beside her, gesturing to the people around them. "Reinhardt, Torbjörn, Mei-Ling, Satya. All very nice! Group, meet Mako. Friend from old school. Lighting and Sound Design student."

"Nice to meet you, _freund_!" came the booming voice of the German boy - _Reinhardt_ \- as he gave a grin to rival Aleksandra's. "I look forward to vurking with you!"

Mako couldn't help but smile back, hoping it showed in his eyes. He still hadn't moved the scarf from across his mouth. "Same t'you." 

The small Chinese girl, Mei-Ling, piped up next. "Mako, where are you from? We've got a whole lot of different nationalities here. It's fascinating."

He finally pulled the scarf away to reply, smile still evident on his lips. "I've lived here f'r years, but my family's from New Zealand. Ya will have met my ma, Mrs Rutledge." a nod from the group, and an _ahhhh_ of understanding. She taught the course, after all. "She's Māori. _Kia ora koutou katoa._ "

Mako grinned wider as Mei-Ling's eyes lit up, warm brown irises drinking in the unfamiliar language. "Oh, what does that mean, what does that mean?"

"Means _hello to you all_." he declared, and the group gave warm smiles of appreciation. He had even managed to crack a smile from Satya, who was pretending to not be paying attention.

"Well, _wǒ hěn gāoxìng rènshi nǐ_! Nice to meet you!"

" _Trevligt att träffas_."

" _Āp se mil ke ḫuśī huī._ "

" _Schön, Sie zu treffen!_ "

" _Skol'ko let, skol'ko zim_! It's been too long, friend!" came Aleksandra's final, happy addition, clapping him on the back with a little more force than required.

This was a good start to the year.

**********

The question had been burning in him all day, slowly encroaching on his mind like a wildfire. He had to ask.

"Zary?"

At his call, she finally tore her eyes away from her phone, looking up at Mako. "Yes? What is it?"

"Who's th' blonde kid over there?"

Aleksandra turned none-too-subtly in her seat, craning her neck to follow Mako's gaze. Her eyes quickly locked on her target. He was sat on the other side of the dining hall, amongst a small group of friends - a girl in bright pink, another in orange and blue, and a boy in neon green. _A brightly-coloured group overall, then,_ Mako thought to himself. The blonde was boisterous at best, giggling and messing around with his new friends, left hand curled around the other boy's shoulders, the right-

The right, missing from the elbow down, rubbing at his hair.

Mako hadn't even noticed.

It didn't seem to stop the boy, though, and he was having an excellent time messing up his friend's hair. The boy in green retaliated with an attack of his own, sending the blonde's spiked locks in all directions, and the four giggled as they were arranged into a makeshift crown.

His heart skipped too many beats to be normal.

Aleksandra grinned at the scene, finally turning back, and leant closer to him. "Zat is Jamison Fawkes. Musical Theatre. Singing prodigy, I hear." She clicked her fingers in front of Mako's face, breaking him from his thoughts. "Why do you want to know, huh~?" she teased, winking at Mako, laughing loudly at the blush that lit his cheeks.

"S' nothing. Just wonderin'. Jesus."

 _He wasn't "just wondering" in the_ slightest.

"Sure, _durachok_. Sure."

**********

[1 New Message]

MOTHERSHIP: _Usual tonight. Stay til 4, lift home. Ok?_

Reply: _Sure_. 

Send.

Well, that was that. Mako was used to this happening. Despite him living alone now, he appreciated the lift home, especially now his usual transportation was gone. His mother's teaching work often meant he was left to his own devices. He spent that time - always had - up in the main performance hall, high above the stage, tweaking the lighting controls back to their rightful places. The cleaners always, _always_ moved them about, and it was _annoying._

Today was one of those days.

In a way, he had always loved this time he had. A time to be silent, to reflect and to think, to have control over even the smallest of things. That comforted him. He moved the dials, softly, almost reverently, watching as the stage returned to its warm yellow glow. For a few minutes, there was nothing but the hum of the lights, and it was peaceful.

A slow creak broke through that.

Mako leant over, just a little, still hidden in darkness. _That was the stage left door._ He watched as a familiar face poked out from the wings - _Fawkes!_ \- and felt his heart skip a beat as the boy approached. He hadn't noticed Mako was there. The blonde looked about shyly, glanced in confusion up at the lights, and was blinded for a second for his trouble. Mako stifled a grin, then. 

_What an idiot._

Once he seemed sure he was alone, the boy slid his backpack down - quite expertly - to hang at the elbow of his missing arm, using the other to fish out his phone. After shoving it in his pocket, he pulled out another object, placing it down on the floor with a little effort. It looked like a box, long, black and rectangular, and Mako couldn't think of what it could be. Jamison gave a wince from the weight's strain on his arm, but was still silent. _It seems strange, seeing him not talk_. Placing his bag safely to one side, he flopped down next to the box, pressing a button on the front before pulling out his phone.

He seemed deep in thought, then, biting his lip as his bright eyes searched through _something_.

_Cute._

Eventually he found what he was looking for, evidenced by the adorable little bounce he gave, and tapped it with a flourish.

_Double cute._

Music began to flow from the box - _a portable speaker! -_ and Mako realised just what was happening. He was about to see a Musical Theatre student practising, a private little show just for him, and it was _Jamison Fawkes_ , the so-called prodigy, the one who had single-handedly taken his heart and refused to let go, who _had no idea he was there._

It felt _exhilarating_.

The music slowly grew in volume, and Jamie had already stood, looking out to the empty hall as if a full audience was already there. A change seemed to have washed over him, standing to his full height, usual smile replaced with one of concern. It was as if someone had walked in crying, and for a second Mako was tempted to look for himself.

_Damn actors-_

Horror struck him.

_Oh, Christ._

_It_ had _to be Les Miserables, didn't it?_

He swore to himself he wouldn't cry.

And then Jamie sang.

_"God on high, hear my prayer... in my need, You have always been there. He is young, he's afraid - let him rest, Heaven blessed."_

His voice was _incredible_ , vibrato reverberating through the hall, full of emotion and pain. Mako wanted to _hug_ the poor kid, but occupied himself by biting down onto his sleeve. _Mustn't cry._

_"Bring him home... bring him home... bring him h-home."_

The break of his voice, the little stutter he gave, was enough to bring tears to Mako's eyes, but he pressed on, rubbing them away with an already-damp sleeve.

 _"He's like the son I might have known, if God had granted me a son."_ His voice rose further in volume, filling the room with its intensity, eyes locked with an imaginary Circle. " _The summers die, one by one, how soon they fly on and on - and I am old, and will be gone."_

His voice was soft again, and pleading.

Mako felt the same.

_"Bring him peace, bring him joy - he is young, he is only a boy."_

_Yes, please do,_ he thought, noting the desperate expression on Jamie's face. _Bring him joy._

_"You can take, You can give: let him be, let him live!"_

And then the rise again, the gasp for breath into the blonde's lungs, the splaying of an arm and a half spread wide in reverence-

_"If I die, let me die! Let him live..."_

They were both crying now.

_"Bring him home..."_

Mako swallowed hard, choking back a gulp for air.

_"...bring him home..."_

Jamison looked up, his amber eyes knowing and _smiling_ and-

_"...bring him home."_

A note, held unbelievably long, that trailed into a beautiful quiet. A happy sigh followed it.

He packed up his things, and disappeared.

Silence, save the humming of the lights.

A silence Mako didn't like after all.


	2. My Direction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nm2iTP1NaB4 :)

It turned out, when he walked in the next day, that the girl in pink was in his class. She was just as noisy as yesterday, and Mako wondered how he’d overlooked her before. _Too short, maybe?_ It was entirely possible. Being six feet tall made it difficult to spot those who barely scraped five-five. They had been placed in a group together, along with the boy in green from before - _oh God, he’s even shorter_ \- and they quickly introduced themselves.

“I’m Hana Song! Great to talk to you at last!”

“Lúcio Correia dos Santos.” A grin, and a shake of the hand. “How’s it going?”

A smile.

“Mako Rutledge.”

The teacher hushed the class, then, cutting off all further conversation. He wasn’t _intimidating_ , but Mako knew this teacher, had heard stories of outbursts and detentions, and had decided quite early that he wasn’t one to be messed with. With some effort, the teacher hauled a stack of models out from under the front desk, distributing them to each table. Attached by wire were little control boxes, and the students noted with delight that they were model stages, complete with working lights.

“Alright. Today, all day, we’ll be working with these models. You can move the lights around, dim them, change the colours, whatever.” A shrug. “First of all, though, you’ll see each element has a letter sticker. Grab some paper, give me all the names you know. Highest score gets a prize. Five minutes. _Go!_ ”

_Jackpot._

Mako was in his element.

In his peripheral vision he could see Lúcio staring, blinking in disbelief, watching as the words slowly filled up the page. _Advance Bar. Baby Spot. Battens. Downlight. Fresnel. Iris. Rigging. Saturation Rig. Shutter. Slots. Strobe. Working lights._

Just a few of many.

Five minutes were up in no time at all, his new friends expressing their amazement, fist bumps and high fives filling the air with jubilant noise.

“Nice work, dude, that was amazing! How’d you know all that stuff?”

A grin. “Been doin’ this a while.”

“Ah, Rutledge. Should have guessed you’d enjoy that task, eh?” came the teacher’s praise, a clap on the back, a round of applause for the winner. Him. “How would you like to do the lighting for the Musical Theatre students every once in awhile?”

 _Oh,_ **_that’s_ ** _what I call a prize._

“Sure. I’d love to.”

**********

His second period was going to be spent, to his amusement, doing just that. He had been shepherded down the corridor to the main hall, where an assembled group of actors were waiting for him - he spotted Jamison easily in the crowd, shock of blonde hair still blazing bright as ever.

“Ladies and gents, this is Mako Rutledge. He’ll be lighting the stage for you. You’ve got your monologues from earlier - now you’ve got to note down what your lighting is. Mako here will control it for you.” Another clap to the back. “And no blackout spotlights without good reason- _I’m looking at you, Fawkes.”_

That infuriating, unbelievable, adorable, _cheeky_ grin again. Amber eyes looking right at him.

“Got it, sir, don’t’cha worry.”

_Fuck._

With a wave of the teacher’s hand, the group dispersed, and a buzz of chatter rose into the room.  Pushing his hands into his pockets, Mako glanced around, trying to identify the people around him - Jamison was talking to the final girl from yesterday’s group. She was sporting tousled brunette hair, and a set of orange goggles kept it spiked at odd angles. The girl was working on Jamie’s left sleeve, rolling it up to the elbow, complaining all the while. He only grinned in response, messing up the spikes on her hair in thanks.They seemed very close.

He caught a name through the noise - _Lena_.

And then Jamison approached.

An outstretched hand - _the left, of course_ \- and a grin full of greeting. “Hey, Mako! Nice ta talk t’ ya properly. M’name’s Jamison Fawkes.” A wink, that had Mako battling back a blush. “But you can call me Jamie.”

_Left hand handshake, smile, stay calm._

“Nice to meet ya too, Jamie.”

_Nailed it._

“I just wanted ta say thanks fer helpin’ me out yesterday.” The grin became a smile, warm, genuine, full of gratitude. “You were a real lifesaver.”

“No problem.” A smile in return. “Anytime.”

_Please, please. Anytime._

“Thanks!” A glance to a waving Lena. “Oh, well, I gotta go practise my speech now. See ya!”

“See ya.”

**********

This time, there was no silence. There was chatter, footsteps, one gait faster than the other, giggles entwining in the air. _Lena and Jamie_.

“C’mon, Jamie, what’cha gonna sing? Ya can’t keep me in the dark foreva’!”

Jamie didn’t respond, and Mako leant forward-

_Oh, dammit, Jamison..._

The blonde in question was scrambling up onto the stage, bent at ninety degrees, two legs kicking for purchase and one arm clawing at the polished wood.

It was a weird feeling to watch Lena do exactly what he was desperate to do. Every fibre of his being burned to help the boy up onto the stage, but he was forced to watch as somebody else made the movements his body craved to make, laughed in that lilted, feminine way, and received _the grin_ that he had wanted to see for himself.

Sat finally on the edge of the stage, tiny hips squeezed between the footlights, Jamie responded with a smirk.

“Hm…” he began, making a little show of stroking at a nonexistent beard. He cocked an eyebrow, and made a rather convincing villain. “It’s from your favourite…!”

Mako couldn’t see Lena’s face, but judging by her sharp intake of breath, he assumed it was positive. “Oh my gosh, you’re singin’ from _Hairspray?_ ”

Jamie only grinned, again, and reached into his pocket.

The empty hall burst into sound.

“Hey, little girl, with the cash to burn - well, I'm selling something you won't return!” Jamie winked, he sung, he smiled, amber eyes watching as Lena bounced in time. “Hey little girl, take me off the shelf, 'cause it's hard having fun playing with yourself! Once you browse through the whole selection, shake those hips in my direction-”

She did just that.

“Bring it back if she never did see, take me home and then _unwrap_ me!” A shrug, with a wiggle of the shoulders. Jamie’s expression was entirely flirtatious, and Mako felt his shirt collar grow a little too tight for his liking. “Shop around with every dollar, I've got to be…”

“The ladies' choice, ladies' choice, the ladies' choice!” came Lena’s voice in reply, bright and clear as a bell, dragging Mako back to reality.

_The leading lady._

Jamie bounced to his feet, Lena quickly following to stand onstage with him.

“Hey little girl looking for a sale, test drive this American male!”

What would have been two hands, ghosting over Jamie’s chest.

“It's gonna take cash to fill my tank, so let's crack open your piggy bank!”

Dancing feet, and a left hand taking Lena’s right.

“Hey little girl, you're window shopping, I got something _traffic stopping_!”

A lewd thrust of the hips.

Mako had seen enough.

 _I should have known_.

Unaware of the figure upstairs, the voices continued, Jamison Fawkes and _Zac Efron_ and Lena all in one, notes dancing through the air as if to mock him.

“Hey little girl on a spending spree, I don't come cheap but the kisses come free!  On closer inspection, I'm sure that you'll agree…”

He put his headphones in his ears, and closed his eyes.

_“I'm the ladies' choice, I’m the ladies’ choice, I’m the ladies’ choice!”_


	3. Why This Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> https://open.spotify.com/track/5KMR4bfBV3EeEDU9P0p7mO
> 
> Had to use Spotify for this song track. Sorry, friends! Hope you enjoy! <3

_I should have known, I should have known, I should have known._

That was the sentence ringing, winding in his head, twisting sorrow around his every thought like thorns. He couldn’t focus, not now. _God, it was obvious, why didn’t I see it before? Of course he’s straight. Of course he likes Lena. I should have seen this coming._

_Fuck._

The blonde’s cheery morning greeting had been ignored, Mako’s eyes staring at the stones beneath his feet. He fought back the guilt that came with hearing the quiet “ _oh_ ”. He had been silent in his first lesson, more so than usual, prompting worry from Lúcio and Hana. He had brushed it off as illness, being tired, having a lot to think about. 

The latter, at least, was true. He tried to keep the invasive, hurtful thoughts out of his head, but they came in waves, tidal and random as the ocean. 

_Lúcio knew. Hana knew. They kept it secret. They want you to stay away from them, from Lena, from Jamie._

_No._

_Jamison_ , he reminded himself, closing his eyes. _Jamison Fawkes._

_Just Fawkes._

_Better to move away now_ , he reasoned. Create distance. Stay away, keep him out of mind, before your heart breaks. 

_It already has._

********** 

The bell rang for break time, right on cue, and Mako was already practically out of the door. He needed time alone. Walking briskly to the library - _somewhere quiet_ \- he set up his favourite spot, a little corner all to himself, sunlight streaming through the window beside him. Pressing his headphones into his ears and skipping to a random song, he tried to steel himself, before giving a sigh of defeat. 

_“Every breath you take, every move you make-”_

The mellow voice of Sting stopped abruptly as he skipped again, giving a low grunt of annoyance. _Not now, The Police. A “love song” about a stalker is not exactly what I need right now. Piss off._

_“Coming out of my cage, and I’ve been doing just fine…”_

Mako swore under his breath as he moved to skip again - _Jesus, this is even worse for right now_ \- and found his skips had run out. 

_“How did it end up like this?”_

He rested his forehead in his hand. 

_This is going to be hard._

A flash of blonde through the window, down on the ground a floor below. 

This intrusion into his peripheral vision made him look up against his will, watching the scene with interest. His heart gave an involuntary pang of sadness as he saw Jamie sat there, head in his hands, sighing dramatically. Mako could have sworn he saw a glittering tear drip onto the bench. Lúcio had a hand on his back, rubbing gentle circles, an apologetic smile on his lips. Silent words of encouragement from Hana. Lena, approaching, making Fawkes glance up and laugh at a joke that spilled from her lips. 

_Right._

He pushed away any thought of sympathy, turning back to his phone. 

[1 New Message] 

ZARY: _u ok?_

Reply: _alright._ Send. 

ZARY: _thats a no then. hardt says ur moping in library_

Mako looked up, and there he was, giving a little wave with a big hand and a bigger smile. 

Reply: _little shit._ Send. 

ZARY: _tell me whats up_

Reply: _just useless bullshit dont worry._ Send. 

ZARY: _too late_

ZARY: _already worrying_

Reply: _ugh fine its dumb crush stuff ok_

Backspace, held too long. 

Reply: _dont._

Send. 

********** 

He still felt guilt when Fawkes looked at him. The blonde’s amber eyes would glance with a glimmer of hope, only to fizzle out when Mako turned away. His peripheral vision, that wonderful tool, showed the other boy slouching a little before shaking his head, looking back at whatever he had been doing. 

_We can’t be friends. Not right now._

_It’s for the best._

He wondered when Fawkes would ask Lena out, if he ever would. 

Especially now the boy was sat on the stage, sniffling quietly, running a hand’s long fingers through his hair. He wasn’t quite crying, but seemed to be on the very verges of it, and Mako had to fight off a wave of pity. _His crush on Lena must be pretty strong._

Eventually he dragged the speakers out of his bag, setting it down with a little less care than usual. The phone was placed beside it, and he swiped up and down on its shining surface, reading the song titles he found there. After a sigh of defeat, he tapped one, and the sound began to drift into the air. 

Crickets’ chirps, and violins, and the sounds of dogs barking at the moon - all to accompany this boy who did not sit up, did not look up, did not sing to an invisible crowd. 

His audience was just the splinters in the wood. 

This was real. 

“Why does Saigon never sleep at night? Why does this girl smell of orange trees?” 

_Ah. Miss Saigon._

“How can I feel good when nothing's right? Why is she cool when there is no breeze?” 

Mako rolled his eyes, almost begrudgingly. _Correction: a love song from Miss Saigon._

“Vietnam - you don't give answers, do you friend? Just questions that don't ever end…” 

That rising voice again, softly this time, begging not at a deity but merely the footlights. 

“Why, God? Why today? I'm all through here - on my way. There's nothing left here that I'll miss, why send me now a night like _this_?” Desperation, a hand clasped into his hair. “Who is the girl in this rusty bed? Why am I back in a filthy room? Why is her voice _ringing_ in my head? Why am I high on her cheap perfume?” 

Fawkes rocked back, for just a moment, and Mako saw those amber eyes glittering with sadness again. 

“Vietnam - hey, look, I mean you no offense, but why does nothing here make sense?” 

“Why, God? Show your hand! Why can't one guy understand? I've been with girls who knew much more, I never felt _confused_ before!” 

The rise again, full of the visceral agony of _love_. 

“Why me? What's your plan? I can't help her, no one can! I liked my memories as they were - but now I'll leave rememb'ring her…!” 

The music sped, now, his voice filled with bitter anger, gesturing with his left arm with the energy of both. A look of frustration marred his face. 

“When I went home before, no one talked of the war, what they knew from TV didn't have a thing to do with me! I went back and re-upped! Sure, Saigon is corrupt! It felt better to be here driving for the embassy!” A gasp for precious air, as the song met the smallest of rests. “'Cause here if you can pull a string, a guy like me lives like a _king_ \- just as long as you don't believe anything...!” 

Silence, as tears were wiped from his cheeks. 

“Why God? Why this face? Why such _beauty_ in this place? I want my memories as they were, but now I'll leave rememb'ring her…!” 

Amber eyes, locked with the ceiling. 

“Just _her_ …” 

Breaths, erratic and deep, fraught with hiccups and sobs. 

_Just ask her, Fawkes. Make yourself happy, for fuck’s sake._

Mako looked away. 

********** 

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

_Click._

That familiar voice, reassuring, strong. “Allo?” 

A sigh. 

“Hey, Aleksandra. Can I talk t’ya?” 

“It is late, Mako - but for you, I make exception.” He could almost hear the grin in her voice. “Finally telling me what is wrong, are you?” 

“Not if ya carry on like that.” he joked in response, sitting on his bed. “I wanted ta ask… if ya liked someone - y’know, _like-liked_ them - but they like someone else… how do ya get over that?” 

He rolled his eyes as an excited _oooooooooooooh!_ burst through the phone’s speakers, making him wince a little with its pitch. “Mako Rutledge finally admits he has a _crush!”_

“That’s not helping, Aly-” 

“Oh, come on, Mako. Let me guess. Is it Fawkes? It has to be Fawkes. You go redder than a tomato when you’re near him-” 

“ _Aleksandra!_ ” Mako closed his eyes, his anger having made his voice much louder than he wanted. “Yes, it’s Jamison Fawkes. He’s a little shit an’ way too fuckin’ good for this earth _an’ he has a crush on Lena_. There. Happy?” 

Laughter was not what he had expected. 

“Oh, Mako, sometimes you are a moron!” 

_Wait, what?_

“Jamison doesn’t like Lena - he likes _you_!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked that chapter! Comments are very much appreciated! <3
> 
> P.S. Want more Highschool AU? Check out the wonderful inspiration by Yazzdonut - though if you're in this fandom I doubt you've missed it! :)


	4. So Worth The Yearning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqXTy64HIz0

“You are unbelievable, _durachok_. How did you not realise?”

A laugh rang out among the assembled group as Mako slumped, face turning bright red. He pressed his head to his folded arms, groaning loudly into the fabric of his sleeves. “I dunno! It just got in my head that he was straight, okay?” he whispered, as if it would incriminate him. “Not my fuckin’ fault. Still ain’t given me proof he likes _me_ at all.” 

“He definitely likes you in _some_ way, Mako.” came the slightly more comforting voice of Mei-Ling, patting him on the shoulder. “He’s looked at you at least four-” she stopped, the fur on her coat hood shifting as she turned. “-uh, _five_ times now. We’ve been in here for lunch for ten minutes. He’s got _some_ interest in you.” 

Mako glanced up, and sure enough, Jamison’s amber eyes were not-so-subtly fixed on him, before they were hurriedly turned away again. “...right.” 

“You should talk to him!” 

He shot a glare at the source of the suggestion, letting the purest essence of _fuck off, Torbjorn_ flood his irises. The other boy got the message, his hands rising in mock apology, a shit-eating grin on his face. “Not a fuckin’ chance. I’ve been ignoring him these past few days, he probably thinks I’m an asshole.” 

“All the more reason to talk to him, friend! Even if he does, it can be changed - but only if you talk to him!” Reinhardt added, smiling as well. _Damn idealists._

Satya spoke behind a smirk, picking at her sky-blue nails. “I agree. You’re obviously rather smitten yourself.” 

“ _Tō raho._ ” Mako muttered under his breath in response, grinning a little under his blush as Aleksandra cackled. _Revenge!_ His mother would have skinned him if she’d heard him using such language, but Aleksandra found it hilarious, being one of the few he’d told the meaning to. Her hearty laugh was infectious, and he felt his embarrassment drifting away from him. 

“ _Chutiya._ ” came Satya’s reply, having assumed - correctly - that it was an insult. She hadn’t stopped smirking. Mako didn’t understand the word, naturally, but he got the gist. 

_Touché._

Shaking his head with a grin, he turned back to his laughing friend, watching as she brushed a tear of mirth from one eye. His voice went quiet again, leaning so only his group could hear. “So, uh, Aleks - d’you know how he lost his arm ‘n leg? Illness, accident, or what?” 

She raised an amused eyebrow, but humoured him. “Nothing for certain. I heard it happen a couple of years ago - in car with his parents, a learner motorbike comes along, they had to swerve around them. Lost control, hit a tree, he got mangled with the car metal. Lost his right arm below the elbow and right leg below knee.” she muttered, watching as Mako mouthed _shit_. “They say he was very lucky to survive.” 

“You’re tellin’ me. His arm, and leg, too - that must have been awful for ‘im.” A sigh. He glanced up at the blonde, finding the plastic sheen on his ankle that Mako had never noticed before. “Poor kid.” 

_Understatement of the century._

“It doesn’t seem to get him down, though.” Mei-Ling spoke then, always the one to lighten the mood. “I haven’t talked to him, but he always looks bright and happy. His lack of an arm doesn’t seem to stop him.” 

A laugh, far away, sound dancing with the chatter in the canteen. Amber eyes bright and wide and smiling, messing around with good friends. 

“Talk to him, Mako. He likes you. Honest.” 

_We’ll see._

********** 

The door to the stage hall was locked. 

_Great._

Releasing the handle with a sigh, he turned, looking down the corridor. No sign of the caretaker. _Goddamnit._ Making a mental map of the school, he glanced upwards for a moment, trying to remember where their area was. _I should ask for a key myself._

He set off. 

_I wonder where Jamison is_ , he found himself thinking. _Am I early? Or is he just late?_

He turned the corner, finally, and spotted the lanky figure, the blonde hair, the sweet smile, talking to the caretaker in his place. _That answers that question._ The man retreated back into the off-limits room, and Jamie stood awkwardly, hand in his pocket. He bit his lip absentmindedly. As Mako approached, Jamie turned his head, and his eyes flickered for a moment before realisation struck his pale cheeks pink. Mako assumed he was blushing a little, too, but battled it back with a little effort. 

“Hey, Jamie. You getting the key to the hall?” _Wait, shit, how would I know he sings after school?_ “My friends have heard you practise in there sometimes.” 

_Nailed it._

Jamie’s eyes lit up, then, and his blush reddened. “Oh, yeah, uh, I do! Gotta take all tha chances I can get, y’know, ta practise. Auditions are hard- but, ah, I s’pose ya already knew that- n-not ta say it’s bad if ya didn’t-” 

Jamie trailed off. Mako gave a soft smirk at his words, somewhat prideful that the normally-confident Jamison Fawkes was stuttering in his presence. 

_Cute._

“I getcha.” His smirk turned into a smile, voice softer now than before. He hoped the other boy would relax. “Mind if I join you? I was thinkin’ of practising with th’ lighting control board in my downtime.” _Only a half-lie._

“Oh, uh, sure!” That grin again, lighting up his face. “Gimme a sec.” He turned quickly, taking the keys from the caretaker, and offered a heartfelt thanks. Starting back down the corridor, Jamison bounced a little as he looked back to Mako. 

_“C’mon!”_

********** 

Mako tried to pretend that this was a new experience. It wasn’t. 

At least now he didn’t have to hide. 

Jamison was sat on the stage again, long legs crossed at pointed angles, scrolling through his phone. Mako had, eventually, hooked up the phone’s Bluetooth to the speakers, allowing Jamie’s _Book Of Mormon_ ringtone to deafen them. _Ding-dong._ With a small smile, he leant over the control board - carefully - and gave the blonde a thumbs-up to begin. 

A grin, and a thumbs-up in return. 

_Kei te mateoha ia…_

The music began, into a song he didn’t quite know. Jamie stood, hand in his pocket, but was looking at the floor this time. His feet - _foot? Feet?_ \- were fidgety with what seemed to be nerves. 

_It’s just ‘cause there’s an audience. Nothin’ more._

He seemed… _shy_? 

“I know too well that I'm just wasting precious time, in thinking such a thing could be that you could ever care for me…” That smile, soft and sweet, lighting Jamie’s face. “I'm sure you’d hate to hear that I _adore_ you, dear, but grant me just the same, I'm not entirely to blame…” 

Golden eyes turned upwards, locked on him. On _Mako._

“For _you'd_ be so easy to love, so easy to idolize, all others above!” Jamie swayed softly in time to the music, smile still tugging at his lips, a little pink blush on his cheeks. “So sweet to waken with, so nice to sit down to eggs and bacon with…” 

Mako hurriedly touched the tips of his fingers to his cheeks, and found a burning warmth across them. _Shit, shit, shit._

“We'd be so grand at the game, so carefree together, that it does seem a _shame_ …” 

Nervous, shy, gentle. One good hand, rubbing at the other arm. A glance away, and a hopeful look back. 

“...that you can't see your future with me, 'cause you'd be oh, so easy to love…” 

That smile, only for him. 

_Ka mate ahau i te aroha e._

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked that chapter! Comments are very much appreciated! <3
> 
> P.S. Want more Highschool AU? Check out the wonderful inspiration by Yazzdonut - though if you're in this fandom I doubt you've missed it! :)


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